So often we look to feel good about ourselves by what we see in others eyes, reflecting back at us. Oprah Winfrey once said the way to eliminate identity anxiety is learning how to climb into the head of the ones we speak with, listening as if we are in their shoes going through their experience. An empowering surprise occurs. The self validation you receive from the person you are speaking with is warm and grateful. It works in sweats, heels, surprise grocery store run ins. It works at parties, city events and interviews. In taking the focus off your self, your verbal responses are more flowing, your eyes are softer and you will not over-bear or go into anxiety about conversation. It’s not about faking it; it’s about being less self absorbed, which in turn, makes you less intimidating and a winner to others.
