Though I have always had the gift of Intuitive Vision, in my Estrogen years the way I perceived the world and myself would crash into a sort of self-pity and loneliness two weeks before my period. My reality was tinged of course, not by my true positive character, but the internal storm of my hormones.
When I think about the ancient Native American Ceremonies that prohibited menstruating women from joining in festivity for fear their energy would disrupt the calm of others I think back and know I was one of those melancholy, easily angered P.M.S. triggered souls.
WHEN I TURNED 50 – WHAT’S THIS? {“WELL HELLO SELF”}
When I turned 50 a wonderful calm came into my life and I could wake up with it, go to bed with it, and it did not leave me. Of course, everyday financial decisions dictated my life like everyone else, but my way of dealing with emergency and crisis was not so radical and I could make less emotional choices. I understood at last why the circles of white and grey-haired medicine women and men made so many tribal decisions. Without raging male testosterone to distort aggression, or feminine estrogen to distort melancholy, we find at
Though like every Human I have personal demons and blessings that go beyond hormones into Past Life issues, I can only say that Menopause has given me a reboot and a second chance at redefining who I am and what my goals are. I purchased a small studio, published five books, had the time to work out, and sleep better, and I began to rescue animals in my community.
I JOINED A TRIBE OF LIKE-MINDED WOMEN
Like days of old, when I put out to the universe what I wanted in a partner, after menopause I began to search for a like-minded tribe. These people did not have to be my best friends. A tribe can be anything from a church circle, running group, food pantry to Yoga. The point is not to be consumed with political agendas. A tribe is a support group, there when the cycle of life kicks you down. It can be as small as three people or larger. They are the strong shoulders who assist during tough times when we need a reality check. But you must give strength as well as take it. Being a lone wolf is not an excuse. We are all tribal. Even if this tribe exists in Social Networking. It is sanity during the storm.
LEARNING TO TAKE MY BITCH PILL – SAGE WISDOM
If you allow the broken or wounded to come home with you, or choose to nurture one as your lover, you too will get sucked into the dark rabbit hole of crisis. I have stopped being afraid to say “No” and feel justified in teaching people how to treat me, not by yelling or harsh words, but by walking my talk. I have learned when enough is enough. No family or friendship is perfect, and there will be times when our attitude bounces back on us from the people we love. Stand back, get out of your pity party and ask yourself, “what in me is driving the dog away, my partner to walk on glass, the store clerk to cop an attitude and the kids to defend themselves?
HONORING THE POWER OF THE PAUSE – CRONE WISDOM
In my wisdom, I am learning the power to think before reacting. This is one of the most important tools in life I have learned. It works when I want to defend myself, {pause}, and realize I am triggering an argument fueled by my own insecurities. It works when I am internet shopping, {pause}, and wait until the next day. About to eat too much? {pause} how will I feel afterward? Text someone too often, too soon {pause} is it really something that HAS to be said? If not, wait and see what happens.